Abuse can come in many forms—whether physical, including sexual, emotional, and financial. There are other forms of abuse, but these are the most common. If you are a victim of an abusive spouse and are considering divorce, it is important to know your options, your rights, and have a plan to move forward.
Physical Abuse
Victims of domestic violence should focus on their safety first. First, call the police. It is a crime to assault a family member. You should also seek medical attention and document everything. Pictures of the abuse will help aid the court in protecting you. Reach out to friends or family if you need to leave the house. There are also local shelters that may be able to house you and protect you from your abusive spouse. If you have children, do not leave them with your abuser.
Additionally, abuse can take the form of sexual abuse. Sexual intimacy between spouses still requires consent. If you are a victim of sexual abuse, contact the police and seek medical attention right away.
Once you are safe, reach out to an attorney who can help you begin the process. You may also want to consider a protective order.
A spouse may seek a Texas protective order if family violence have occurred. If granted, the protective order can, among other things, order the abuser to not hurt or threaten you, forbid them from coming near you or contacting you. Protective orders generally last two years but can be longer depending on the severity of the situation.
Emotional Abuse
Examples of emotional abuse are belittling, name calling, or being controlling. If you are a victim of emotional abuse, it is important to document the abuse. You should keep notes of the date and event that took place. It is also important to have a support group through this time. Talking to someone is very important. You may have lived under the abuse for quite some time and have now normalized it. Talking to a loved one about the abuse can get someone else’s perspective. Additionally, a trained therapist can help you understand how your brain is interpreting the abuse and train you how to protect yourself.
Financial Abuse
Financial abuse is also a form of control. This is where one spouse maintains control of the finances, keeps the other spouse in the dark on their finances, or gives them limited access to funds. For example, a stay-at-home mother does not have access to the family’s operating account. In these situations, there may not be a lot you can do without asking the court for assistance during the divorce. However, you may reach out to the bank and see if you are listed on the account. If so, open your own checking account and transfer enough funds to pay for necessities and attorney’s fees until the court can give you more access to community funds. Additionally, you may qualify for a credit card or can borrow money from friends or family.
How Does Abuse Impact a Texas Divorce?
Texas is a no-fault divorce state. This means that anyone is entitled to a divorce. You do not have to stay married to your abuser. Victims of abuse should also consult with an attorney on a fault-based divorce, such as cruel treatment. A finding of fault by the court may entitle the victim spouse to a dipropionate award of the community estate.
Practical Steps you Should Take Before Filing for Divorce
- Secure your safety. Report domestic violence and seek help.
- Secure your finances. Open a checking account solely in your name and begin depositing your income there.
- Have your own Google or Apple account. If the spouses share a google or apple account, any of the texts sent or received that are not SMS, may be read by the other spouse.
- Have a personal email address that only you have access to.
- Change your passwords—use something new and not easily guessed. You may consider using a password generator and manager.
- Turn off location sharing with your spouse.
- Have your vehicle inspected for tracking devices such as Apple AirTags. It is a crime for your spouse to track a vehicle only in your name. If you find a tracking device, do not touch it and immediately call the police. If the vehicle is in both names, take pictures and remove the device. This may be important evidence in your divorce.
- Share your location with a friend or family member.
- Talk to a lawyer.
The attorneys at Hunt Law Firm, PLLC are here to help. If you would like more information or to speak with an attorney, don’t hesitate to contact us here to schedule a consultation or call us at 832-781-0320.